Rapper Too Short Fatherl Advice to Youth on Turning Girls Out

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Rapper Too Short Gives Fatherly advice to young boys on ‘Turning Girls Out”.

Too Short basically tells boys how to sexually manipulate (and perhaps even assault) girls by pushing “her up against the wall” and using their fingers to pleasure them.

Too Shory goes on to explain:

“When you get to late middle school, early high school and you start feeling a certain way about the girls… I’m gonna tell you a couple tricks. This is what you do, man. A lot of the boys are going to be running around trying to get kisses from the girls, we’re going way past that. I’m taking you to the hole.

There’s a general area down there, a little spot that girls have that feels really good to them. Don’t kiss them down there yet, that’s later in life. But this is what you do. You push her up against the wall or pull her up against you while you lean on the wall and you take your finger and put a little spit on it and you stick your finger in her underwear and you rub it on there and watch what happens. It’s like magic. You gotta find her spot, they all have a different one, but it’s somewhere in there. Just go for it. When you feel like it becomes a little more moist that’s when you know you’re doing it right.”

In a culture where 44% of rape victims are under the age of 18; in a society where someone is assaulted every 2 minuets; with 2/3 of victims committed by someone known by the victim and 38% of rapists being either friends or acquaintances, and 15 of 16 rapists will never spend a day in jail, the sanctioning and normalization of violence against women/girls stands squarely in opposition to creating a just and humane society.  This represents an assault on women/girls through the promotion of sexual violence, acceptance of denigration and the sanctioning of violence.

Increases in divorce and out-of-wedlock childbearing have dramatically altered the family life of American children. Whereas in the early 1960s, nearly 90 percent of all children lived with both of their biological parents, today less than half of children grow up with both natural parents.

The absence of fathers leads to the misguided notion of non-responsibility for adolescents and fosters a youth culture of delinquent behavior.  The support and mentoring established in the traditional homes has been neglected and therefore disallowed by these youths.

There are several marked distinctions among African American boys growing up without fathers compared to those growing up with fathers. Boys without fathers in the home have a noticeably higher rate of incidence of drug abuse, school dropout, crime and delinquency, and teen pregnancy.

Boys being raised in female-headed households have a strong need for role models. These role models often are men who are more themselves engaged in deviant, antisocial and often illegal behavior.

It’s disheartening to me knowing that this bullsh*t “advise” came from an African American male.

WTF Too Short, while you’re spewing rhetoric to these young men why stop at how to "finger f*@&#" a girl?  Why not advise them on how to sell drugs, commit a robbery, smoke weed or dropout of school? ..... Sorry, my bad, school is where they find young girls- to turn them out.

Way to go Too Short!!!  

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Summer Jobs and Programs for Youths

FYI: We here at Ree-De's Crafts (me) felt that last month blog was too important of a subject to just post for one weeks viewing. And judging by the hugh amounts of page views and sharing of post we (I) were correct. To all who shared the post, God bless and thank you.  I will be posting a new blog next week.

In the mean time I just wanted to share this with you guys.

If you are looking for a Summer Job or Summer Program for your child Mayor Emanuel and Cook County President Toni Preckwinckle announced One Summer Chicago. One Summer Chicago is a collaborative between the City of Chicago, Cook County, civic and business communities providing summer jobs and programs for youths.  From the website you can:

Apply for summer jobs

Find summer programs

http://lashawnkfordjobs.com/One%20Summer%20Chicago.pdf

Foreclosure Help- Save Your Home

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Are you behind on mortgage payments? Nearing or in foreclosure? Lost your job or cut in pay? YOU ARE NOT ALONE! There are programs available that will not only help you save your home, but also help pay your mortgage. If you think you may be in danger of foreclosure, it is time to take action.  Struggling homeowners should reach out and seek foreclosure prevention counseling immediately. Learn your options, the sooner you call, the sooner you can regain your peace of mind. Remember, you're not alone.

PLEASE, IF YOU CAN NOT USE THIS INFORMATION, BE A BLESSING TO SOMEONE ELSE -PASS IT ON! 

HOPE-  www.995hope.org

Call the Homeowner's HOPE Hotline at 888-995-HOPE(888-995-4673). HOPE is a counseling service provided by the Homeownership Preservation Foundation. HOPE can provide counseling to you, free of charge, in English and 170 other languages, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.

Foreclosed Home- Unclaimed Money -http://services.cookcountyclerkofcourt.org/foreclosure

If your home was foreclosed upon, and the sales or auction price exceeded the amount you owed on the mortgage, then the Clerk's Office may be holding your surplus or equity money, to which you are entitled. Use the search form below to find out if the Clerk's Office is holding money for you. All fields are required.

Click on link below to find out if you may have unclaimed money.

http://services.cookcountyclerkofcourt.org/foreclosure

Mortgage Relief Project -  www.keepyourhomeillinois.org

Governor Pat Quinn has created the Illinois Foreclosure Prevention Network as a service to Illinois residents to bring together the services and resources of various state agencies and qualified participating non-profit agencies to guide you through the process of weighing your options that could help you stay in your home. The Mortgage Relief Project was established to help you take advantage of new programs that can help you lower your mortgage payments, avoid foreclosure and keep your home. These services are free.

MAKING HOME AFFORDABLE ( MHA) - www.makinghomeaffordable.gov/about-mha/Pages/what-is-mha.aspx 

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Making Home Affordable (MHA) is the Obama Administration's initiative that helps struggling homeowners get mortgage relief through a variety of programs that aid in mortgage modifications, interest rate reductions, refinancing, deferred payment or transitioning out of your home while avoiding foreclosure.

Illinois Hardest Hit Program-  www.illinoishardesthit.org

The Illinois Housing Development Authority (IHDA) has partnered with the U.S. Department of Treasury to offer temporary mortgage payment assistance to households that are struggling with income loss due to unemployment or underemployment, but are working to regain sufficient income to keep their home. Borrowers may be currently experiencing an income loss or experienced one in the past that caused them to get behind on their mortgage payments.

The Illinois Hardest Hit Program offers two types of assistance:

1. Reinstatement assistance to pay mortgage arrearages, fees, and penalties in full and

2. Monthly mortgage payment assistance to pay 100% of the mortgage payment owed to the servicer for up to 18 months while the household makes monthly contribution payments to the Illinois Housing Development Authority during their enrollment in the program. Maximum assistance is $20,000 - $25,000, depending on county.
- WARNING -www.illinoishardesthit.org is the OFFICIAL website for the Illinois Hardest Hit Fund Program. APPLYING IS FREE. You will not be asked to pay for any services related to this application.  

Home Affordable Modification Program, known as HAMP - www.makinghomeaffordable.gov/programs/lower-payments/Pages/hamp.aspx

In reaction to the rising tide of foreclosures amid the ongoing subprime crisis, the U.S. Treasury introduced the Home Affordable Modification Program (HAMP) as part of the Financial Stability Act of 2009. This program is expected to help an estimated 7 to 8 million eligible homeowners with loan modifications on their home mortgage debt.

The Obama administration has improved its main foreclosure prevention program (HAMP).

The administration said it was expanding eligibility for its Home Affordable Modification Program, known as HAMP, to borrowers with higher debt loads and tripling the incentives it pays banks that reduce principal on loans.

The administration also said it would offer incentives to Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac to reduce principal on loans. Previously, the government had only offered incentives to private lenders and banks. The program was also extended to December 2013. It was initially set to expire at the end of this year.

Loan Modification Lawsuits Filed Against CitiMortgage, JPMorgan Chase, Bank of America, Wells Fargo, Citibank, and GMAC/Ally

Bank Foreclosure Settlement: After months of investigation and negotiations, Attorney General Lisa Madigan, in conjunction with other state attorneys general, the U.S. Department of Justice and the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development, has secured a national foreclosure settlement with the nation’s five largest mortgage loan servicers – Bank of America, JPMorgan Chase, Wells Fargo, Citibank, and GMAC/Ally – have agreed to a settlement worth a total of $25 billion in assistance to homeowners harmed by fraudulent foreclosure and mortgage servicing practices.

To assist homeowners in determining if they may be eligible for assistance according to the settlement, Attorney General Madigan’s office developed the resources listed below:

http://illinoisattorneygeneral.gov/consumers/settlementpdfs/Homeowner_relief_FAQs.pdf

Deadline has been extended check websit for dates.

Miami Fire Captain Blames Black Shi*t bag Parents for Trayvon's Shooting

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Thug or American Icon?

If you saw this man running through the park, at full throttle, would you think “oh he has that ghetto hoodie look”, and that he’s a thug or would you think he's an American icon? Get real, you would probably not only think thug, but that he also just jacked someone, right? 

This is actually a photo of “The Italian Stallion” (a.k.a.Rocky). In 1976, Sylvester Stallone wrote, starred in, and directed the movie “Rocky” which nabbed Stallone an Academy Award for Best Picture.  The movie Rocky was all about: pride, reputation, and not being another bum in the neighbourhood-who also wore a hoodie.

Since the murder of Trayvon Martin, racism has showed its ugly head with racists hurling racial epithets and posting appalling comments online and in public.

In the recent slew of hatred, Brian Beckmann a captain in the Miami Dade Fire Rescue Department who is currently under investigation after he posted some very alarming comments on Facebook. Allegedly, Brian Beckmann is blaming Trayvon’s shooting on the “shitbag parents” of “our urban youth,” and the “ghetto hoodie look” of young black men like Martin.

Brian Beckmann posts the following comments on Facebook:  “Listening to Prosecutor Corey blow herself and her staff for five minutes before pre-passing judgment on George Zimmerman”. And
“The state seeks reelection again, truth aside. I and my coworkers could rewrite the book on whether our urban youths are victims of racist profiling or products of their failed, shitbag, ignorant, pathetic, welfare-dependent excuses for parent. But like Mrs. Corey, we speak only the truth. They’re just misunderstood, little church-going angels and the ghetto hoodie look doesn’t have anything to do with why people wonder if they’re about to get jacked by a thug.”

Brian Beckmann allegedly created the post on, the same day State Attorney Angela Corey announced that she would file second-degree murder charges against Martin’s killer. Beckmann made further comment, saying that he is a citizen just like anyone else and he has the right to make comments like any other private citizen.

I fully agree with Brian Beckmann, he is a citizen just like

anyone else, and like everyone else he too has an ass.

However, just because you have an "ass" does not give you the right to be an "asshole"! 

What the hell, racisim must be in Florida water!

Rate this Hot Topic Post in the "Comment" section.

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I Will "F" You Up!

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If your 18 yr. old child has the ball-dacity  to threaten you with legal retribution for not surmising to their  wishes are you  morally / legally  wrong if you respond to that  threat, no matter how veil, with a promise of “ I’ll fu*K you up”?

Recently actor/comedian’s Mike Epps 18 yr. old Bria Epps threaten to “(which she subsequently did) “air family dirty laundry” to the news media because she was upset with her father. Apparently, Epps in a recent on air interview sent a shout-out to only 2 of his kids and not all of them. Allegedly, when Bria contacted her father to voice her dismay of being left out, and disrespected their conversation became heated. According to reports, Epps 18-year-old daughter claims he’s been threatening her, promising to “fu*k her up”, and now, she’s turning to the police for help.  Sources close to the comedian says the tension is because Bria asked her father to give her lump sums of cash to pay for her college tuition. Sources say he refused, insisting on paying the school directly and that’s when his daughter snapped and made the threat.

Let me see if I have this right? I gave birth, shelter, clothed, and feed your ungrateful ass.  And now that you are barely legal you feel as though you’re an equal (adult)  and make demands -threatening to air dirty laundry?  Anyone who knows my son , who is well beyond the age of legal, knows that to this day I STILL tell him that I will fu*k him up!

Parents, you have got to stop colt-ling your kid’s and start teaching them life realities’. My grandfather was a cowboy, a preacher, pastored his congregation, worked a full time job to support his family, had a stay at home wife, and raise seven successful kids.  Of all of the life lessons my parents and grandparents taught me; one of the most prevalent, to this very day is, “The world owes you nothing. If you want anything, it is up to you to get off your ass, to ascertain it”.   Well, he never said “ass”, but you get my meaning.  

These damn kids think that as parent we are duty bound and obligated to provide and give them everything. Wrong!  I, most certainly AM NOT.  Anything, I did, do, have done, for my child, I did out of love- not obligations. Parents that are OBLIGATED to care for a child, are paid to do so, and are called Foster Parents.   Parents that care for their child freely, whole heartedly, and affectionately are called Moms and Dads. 

The public is not the place to air out you problems or in this case dirty laundry.  There are some major issues between these two, but I’m riding with Mike…………………. I’ll Fu*k you up!

What the Hell!  Just where the hell do you get off stepping to your parent and demand any damn thing?


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Family Plans To Sue Owner Of Bus Where Student Died

Florida A&M University (FAMU) Hazing: Robert Champion's Family Plans To Sue Owner Of Bus Where Student Died


As a parent the one thing you look forward to is sending your child off to college. Fast forward, the one thing you’ve never anticipated having sent your child off to college is their retuning back home- in a body bag.

Robert Champion, a 26-year-old Florida A&M University student, band member and drum major died after a hazing ritual last November. Champion died after taking part in an annual rite of passage called "Crossing Bus C." The crossing the bus ritual is an initiation process in which pledges attempt to run down the center aisle from the front door of the bus to the back while (allegedly) being punched, kicked and assaulted by senior members, and band members.  According to reports it was well known that hazing rituals were organized on the bus by a group of band members known as "Bus C". Band members would return from the game, drop their gear off in their hotel rooms and return to the bus to haze others who wanted to be indoctrinated into the organization.

The parents of Robert Champion said they will sue the company that owns the BUS where the hazing took place.  Robert Champion's parents and their attorney alleges that the bus company's negligence contributed to his death as band members were allowed to get back on the bus to conduct  hazing rituals after they had returned to an Orlando hotel following a football game. Ray Land, the bus company owner, said that the bus' driver was helping students unload their instruments when Champion collapsed and   his staff did everything to get help once they were notified there was a problem.

The medical examiner's office autopsy ruled Champion's death a homicide. Champion suffered multiple blunt trauma blows to his body and died from shock caused by severe bleeding. The autopsy found "extensive contusions of his chest, arms, shoulder and back," as well as "evidence of crushing of areas of subcutaneous fat," which is the fatty tissue directly under the skin. In Florida Any death involving hazing is a third-degree felony, but no charges have been filed so far in Champion's death.

Ok, if the alleged hazing was an “annual rite of passage”, as reported, why in the hell didn’t FAMU or the Band director Julian White put an end to this egregious behaviour sooner? The Florida’s medical examiner’s office said the case has now been handed over to prosecutors who will make a decision on possible charges. Florida State Attorney's Office said it has received the investigation but could not give a timeline of when a decision will be made in the case.

Our hearts ache for the Champion’s on the tragic loss of their son. A parent should NEVER experience having to bury their child!  However, charging the students who participated in the initiations would only cause more despondency. This was an initiation, and not a homicide.  Initiations are (usually) a secret or mysterious ceremony by which a person is admitted into a group, organization or religion. Yes, the outcome was horrifically tragic.  Yes, the involved students should be held accountable for their actions; however “homicide” infers (malicious) intent. If, according to news reports the participants involved did not set out to commit homicide, but to initiate Champion, There wasn’t any “intent” involved. These students did not intentionally set out to kill Champion.

It just may be me but, if the state of Florida can come to the ridiculous conclusion that the action of the FAMU students was a homicide; why is it that the very same medical examiner and State Attorney’s find it so damn difficult to rule Trayvon Martin ill-fated “incident” for what it was, a homicide and arrest George Zimmerman?  If Trayvon Martin had pulled the trigger and shot Zimmerman- he’d be under the jail!

If you are Black, you’re guilty until proven innocent. If you are white, you’re innocent until proven guilty; unless you have relatives in high places- then you just get away with killing a Black child.

Get the hell out of here! Where they do that at?

Do you agree with the Champions' attorney that the bus company has some liability; they knew or should have known that hazing was occurring on the bus?

Dear Mama, Speak Truth To Your Wayward Sons

Wish I could take credit for this,  had to share. This week it's hitting a special nerve.  You know who you are!

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By: John W. Fountain 

Dear mama, please stop enabling your grown ass son. For he can never be a man so long as you make excuses for, cajole, coddle or carry him, as if he were still your baby boy — though he is now a full-fledged adult male.

Please stop making excuses for the son who refuses to own up to responsibility. The son who is “man” enough to make babies, but not man enough to take care of them. The son who expects women to feed, clothe and cater to him while he spends his “workdays” playing Xbox, smoking blunts and getting toasted with the homeys.

For dear mother, the black man-child sojourning in this broken Promised Land will require more perseverance — fewer excuses — more hope and fortitude — less pessimism and feebleness — if indeed he will succeed.

The world can be a cold hard place for all men — even colder for black men. But the nourishment and substance of mother wit, love, and her stern yet also gentle rearing can be fortifying for all sons.

So dear mother, love and teach the children that their black faces are not a curse or a death sentence. Teach them self-respect and to respect others. And please don’t settle for excuses.

Not from the son who chooses evil over good, or the full-grown son who has never held a legitimate job and has no intention of ever doing so.

The son with money to burn and a brand new “ride,” who insists, even as he showers you with gifts, “I am not a drug dealer.” So you assert, “My son is not a drug dealer.” No, he’s an investment banker (wink, wink).

Dear mother,  IF YOUR CHILD CAN'T READ- OR BY KINDERGARTEN, DON'T KNOW THEIR ABC's. NOR HAVE BEEN TRAINED TO SIT, LISTEN AND LEARN- WHO SHOULD WE BLAME?

Who’s to blame if you denigrate your little boy with curse words, heap upon him the residue of your bitterness for his father? Or if you block the relationship between your baby and your baby’s daddy, scorned because he’s no longer with you?

If you spend the child support on everything except the children, or if your children wear $150 sneakers and the latest fashion but have no solid sense of history; or THEY HAVE FLAT-SCREEN TELEVISIONS BUT NO COMPUTERS; OR ELSE CLUTCH HANDHELD VIDEO GAMES BUT SELDOM A BOOK, WHO'S REALLY TO BLAME?

“A math book will not solve the problem,” a mother wrote to me, regarding my recent columns on personal responsibility. “. . . If you are going to address this issue, you need to be for real and say what is really going on, and not just something that will please white people.”

What’s really going on? It is that we — black people — have grown comfortable playing the blame game and reticent in discussing the need to heal ourselves. What precious tools did our enslaved and brutalized ancestors have, except hope, hard work, fortitude and faith?

And what more transformative tools had those who were forced to bear segregation’s cross than the truth that all men are created equal, and the will to die for what was just, moral and right?

And if the hand that rocks the cradle won’t instill in children these fundamental truths — in a day of far too many absentee fathers — then will somebody please tell me, who will?


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Negotiated Infidelity

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According to Newsweek, roughly 50 percent of married men will cheat, and at least 81 percent won’t admit to it even after their partner asks.

On this week episode of Basketball Wives ( aka-Basketball Jump-off’s), Evelyn Lozada who was once engaged to basketball, Antoine Walker, questions current fiancé Chad Ocho Cinco about alleged rumours flying around the internet regarding Chad’s supposedly infidelities with other women. In his feeble attempt to defend his actions Chad informs Evelyn “that he’s on the road a lot and some minor missteps alone the way”. Being committed to only one person is a new (concept) for him. Evelyn retorts that Chad needed to get his shiz together, they are getting married in 6 months, and to just fess up and tell her the truth. She’d rather know then, not know, about his alleged infidelities. Tell me the truth, go out and get some condoms- be 100 with me”.

And here’s the kick in the azz part- Chad looked Evelyn deeply in her eyes and with a straight face said, “We should both go out, together, and if I see somebody I like I think we should bring her home”.

Okay, stay with me, here is where most woman would ask their man if he’s lost his ever lovin’ rabbit mind, right? Wrong. Instead Evelyn replied “what if I don’t like her-a?”

Is it ever OK to go outside of a marriage? We assume that it's always men that cheat? Don't women do it also? And if women do it, do we need to "negotiated infidelity” in order to "save" the marriage? Would you rather know the truth about your partner's identity even if it were painful? Would you let your husband have a mistress to save your relationship?

Chad Ocho Cinco, or Johnson, or whatever the hell his name is now, needs to respect the sanctity of marriage and realize that his shiz does stink!


IJS




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Does Bad Credit Equal Bad Employee?

There’s an old saying: the best way to get a job is to have a job.

If you're unemployed and suffering from bad credit, a growing number of states' lawmakers want to remove one barrier between you and a new job: a credit check. Many job seekers in the country are in a Catch-22: they’re behind on their bills because they don’t have a job, but they can’t get a job because they’re behind on their bills.” A significant number of elected officials nationwide now believe that in a difficult economy, a poor credit history shouldn't be a determining factor for job applicants.

What a novel ideal- I’m unemployed, so I can’t pay my bills, and because I can’t pay my bill, I can’t get a job.  So, tell me how the hell am I supposed to get off this frigging downward spiral? In an avoidance of the creation of a permanent underclass we now have struggling consumers who are unable to improve their financial situations. The Black populations has complained, for quit sometime, to each other about this discriminating tactic.  Now, that unemployment is in the double digits range, and this no longer just affects “just us”, but “them” too, it’s a problem

The latest screening and hiring trends by human resources firm ADP showed that 41 percent of credit records screened in 2008 showed a judgment, lien, bankruptcy or referral to a collection agency- it could potentially prevent you from getting a job primarily based on your credit history. As unemployment continues to hover near 10 percent, a loss of income often leading to unpaid bills, unemployed borrowers find themselves struggling with financial problems. Reliance on credit report information in hiring decisions can also lead to people being penalized for mistakes made by others. Job seekers could be impacted by errors on their credit reports- errors that a consumer wouldn't know about unless they checked their credit reports

In Chicago Alderman Ameya Pawar (47th Ward) wants to ban discrimination against the unemployed. Alderman Pawar wants to update the Chicago Human Framework to prevent companies from redlining applicants because they’re unemployed, or have bad credit. “Employers have been discriminating against job applicants on the basis of credit history and employment status, and as a result, deny qualified applicants jobs,” Pawar said. “Even with the overwhelming data showing there is no connection between job performance and credit history, employers are consistently weeding out applicants based on credit histories Pawar’s ordinance would allow the city’s Human Relations Commission to take action against companies that discriminate against the unemployed, and will specifically add “employment status (as to unemployment)” to the Chicago Human Rights Framework. It will also prohibit employers from including the phrase “Unemployed need not apply” in Help Wanted ads. (Employers would still be allowed to inquire about employment gaps.) At the state level, Illinois State Rep. Jack D. Franks' introduced a bill -- which still allows for credit checks involving police, financial institutions and insurance companies, among others -- that was signed into law by the state governor in August 2010 and effective January 2011.

A central absurdity of using credit checks in today's economy: some job applicants may be turned away by the same corporations that, amid their own financial troubles, have left workers jobless. "Many of the companies that are using these credit checks are ones that have filed for Chapter 11 themselves. People may have worked for these same companies”. Rep. Franks says. Companies should be the ones answering questions. Employers must be able to justify their reasons for requiring this information and how it directly relates to the position. Since many employers require job applicants to waive their right to privacy, applicants have no other choice than to submit to a credit history inquiry.

Now check this out-In October 2001 the Enron scandal, revealed, and eventually led to the bankruptcy of the Enron Corporation and the dissolution of Arthur Andersen, which was one of the five largest audit and accountancy partnerships in the world. Shareholders lost nearly $11 billion when Enron's stock price, plummeted to less than $1 by the end of November 2001. Many EXECUTIVES at Enron were indicted for a variety of charges and were later sentenced to prison. Enron's auditor, Arthur Andersen, was found guilty in a United States District Court.

If the so called premises of bad credit equates to bad employees; thus justifying employers use of consumer credit checks against prospective and current employees for the purposes of making adverse employment decisions- or worse, a corporate criminal . I presume Enron and Arthur Andersen HR personnel didn’t get the memo to run credit checks on its executives!

 Why wasn’t this perceived as an issue our so-called social and political leaders did not address a long ass time ago including — the narcissistic clergy who live on the tithes of the impoverished while standing aloof or Politicians’ who campaign slogans are based on creating jobs, and yet once elected sit on their butts and pretend not to notice.

Sorry, Rev. Pastor Preacher and Mr. Vote for Me Politician, but if I ain’t got no job, I can’t tithe or give campaign contributions. Can’t help you. Don’t ask for my vote. Don’t ask for my dollars. Poor people have enough problems as it is.


Where They Do That At?

Stop Blaming Bobby for Whitney’s Drug Abuse

Whitney Houston 1963-2012

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Bobby Brown is not responsible for Whitney Houston's drug abuse.

It was no well-kept secret that Whitney was addicted to drugs, and struggled with her addition for years.  And for years people have blamed Bobby Brown for Whitney’s addition. People, please, Bobby Brown is no more responsible for Whitney actions then you or me. Yes, Whitney had this pristine girl next door image that some say was tarnished by Bobby. Yes, Bobby was much younger then Whitney.  He had a bad boy reputation, was in and out of jail, but isn’t that what every good girl wants, a bad boy?

The only person that can be held responsible for Whitney drug habit - is Whitney.  Bobby may or may not have introduced Whitney to drugs, and even if he did it was Whitney’s personal choice to do and continue to do drugs. Each of us makes personal choices daily between what is right and what is wrong.  Whatever choices we make the decision (choice), and the consequences fall solely on our shoulders.  Bobby is no more responsible for Whitney demised then you or me. Her, down fall, addictions, was brought on by her sickness..

 Over the next few weeks people will talk about all of the various accolades that had been bestowed upon Whitney during her life time. Achievements that include the multitudes of musical honour, awards, personal achievements’, and movies that she stared in. they will talk about the string of #1 hit song, and towards the end the songs that flopped that she recorded.  Or her attempt to revise her fading singing career.  Discussions about “Being Bob-by!” Brown and Bobby Kristina. Of the entire multitude of topics about Whitney Houston; all of her personal trials and tribulations, the two things that she will sadly most be remembered for is her tumultuous marriage to Bad Boy Bobby Brown and her addition to drugs.

Wendy Williams said it best- “plague with the demons of our substance abuse. Drugs are a part of our subculture –the addict. It’s sad, just sad”.

 

Sasha Allen: A Tribute to Whitney Houston (YouTube)

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Is Your Man a Mooch?

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Does He:

Not have a job

Has no responsibilities

Begs, borrow and count on others to pay his way

Avoids paying rent-you provide him with a place to stay

 While you are at work He uses your electricity, water, and cable

Ran up his cell phone bill- you paid it- it's in your name

Borrows money several times a week to buy food, cigarettes or beer 

Do you always make sure he's fed, and has gas in his car?

Does he sleep well into the late afternoon?

Plays video games all night

Can’t hold a job for more than a month or two. About the lenght of time it takes for Child Suppoet to kick in.

If you answer yes, to two or more questions, why you fronting- your man a Mooch. But you already knew that.

You may think that you are being “supportive” of your man, but the issue is that you're not helping- you're enabling him. He has managed to turn mooching into an art form at your expense.  His reasoning is that he lacks motivation-he’s motivationally challenged.  Yeah, right kick rocks, bum! 

 Is it me, or does motivationally challenged translates into double talk for “get off my back you’re working. There’s no need in both of us working”.  It's time for these freeloaders to get a wake-up call. ! If it looks like poop, smells like poop, walks like poop ….THEN Its shiz!!! 

He does what he does because it works. If it wasn't working, (then) he would get a job.  Because if he was left/made to support himself ,and did not work he would be out in the cold and hungry. As long as there are no consequences to his behavior, he'll continue mooching. 

Mama always said “’Make sure no matter what, that you can take care of yourself”.   Mama NEVER said anything about making sure you can take care of a man and yourself. A true and real Man will gethis hussle on and not only take care of the household, and the  kids, but also will take care of you.  Stop wearing the pants in the house.

Make that man be a Man. I’m not saying he’s a worthless, no-good, trifling, mooching, lazy ass.  Well, yes, I am.

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Why Do You Stay?

Why do some women feel that they should stay in a relationship when their mate continues to mistreat, disrespects, lies, cheats, and is physically and mentally abusive-why do they stay?

Could it be that because they are lacking the love or relationship that they did not receive from their Father or a positive “Father” figure? Perhaps they are looking for a “father figure” if they grew up without one. Or if they are in an abusive relationship this may be the only type of relationship that they know. There are instances’ where an individual believes that: “unless a man beats me, he doesn’t love me”. I know, go figure that one out. (Sorry, editor’s opinion)

For all of the myriad and lucid reasoning, to the person in this dysfunctional relationship, they often give (as to why they stay) is it’s “for the kids”.

Is staying in a dysfunctional relationship “for the kids” a valid reason to stay? HELL NAW!  (Sorry, editor’s opinion, again)

If you knew someone who was in an abusive relationship whom you previously help leave their abuser, and they kept going back, if the next time you saw them they were all beat up and asked for your help, again would you help them? Say they got what they deserve?  Or give them the "Gurl, if it was me"speech, prentend to care, and then proceed to gossip about them behind their backs?

Editor’s Note: We at Ree-De’s Crafts fervently adhere to the belief that abuse is never deserved or condoned.  

Domestic violence is an ongoing epidemic. Do not let domestic violence, whether past or present, define your identity.

Domestic violence can be defined as a pattern of behavior in any relationship that is used to gain or maintain power and control over an intimate partner.  Domestic violence can happen to anyone of any race, age, sexual orientation, religion or gender. It can happen to couples who are married, living together or who are dating. Domestic violence affects people of all socioeconomic backgrounds and education levels. 

In 1992, The America Medical Association reported domestic violence as the leading cause of injury to women between the ages of 15 and 44. Three to four million women are beaten each year by their partner or spouse, one every 15 seconds. Thirty percent of female homicide victims are killed by their partners or ex-partners, 1,500 women are murdered as a result of domestic violence each year. A 1995 national study found that 31 percent of women surveyed admitted to having been physically assaulted by a husband or boyfriend.

It is important to know the signs and solutions in order to help yourself and/or your loved ones. Victims of domestic violence become experts at hiding their suffering and pretending as if nothing is wrong. They have to, because in most cases they are threatened with more abuse if they share their secret and expose their abusers.

How You Can Help:

• Be non-judgmental:

Don’t be afraid to let him or her know that you are concerned for their safety:

• Help your friend or family member recognize the abuse:

By recognize that what is happening is not “NORMAL" and that they deserve a healthy, non-violent relationship.

• Acknowledge that he or she is in a very challenging and frightening situation.
• Be supportive:

If he or she ends the relationship, continue to be supportive of them.

• Remember that you cannot “rescue” him or her:

Although it is difficult to see someone you care about get hurt, ultimately the person getting hurt has to be the one to decide that they want to do something about it.

If you think your friend or family member may be in an abusive relationship

PLEASE call the 24-hour National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or TTY 1-800-787-3224 to discuss your concerns, questions or for help.